Life advice from those that have learned the hard way and want you to know better than they did
So I was scrolling Insta the other day, as we all do, and found a post that had nine life tips that people wish they knew sooner that had come from a thread on Reddit. This post hit home for me on many levels, and I thought I would share it with a few of my own! Here is what 21 million people on Reddit and myself think you should know.
1. When you don’t have all the facts, give grace -
Tired of waiting for the doctor, they may have just had to tell a patient about an unfavorable test result and need a moment to recoup. Frustrated with the slow driver in front of you, they could be bringing home a birthday cake or are headed home from the hospital with their newborn. In a situation where you don’t know all the facts, try to give as much grace as you can for the behavior. This, in turn, will gradually make you less reactive and more compassionate.
2. Compliment, compliment, compliment -
As adults, we know a bit more than the younger generations. We also know that some kids must go through it before blossoming. If you see a kid in a helmet, braces (legs, back, teeth, etc.), or even a hearing aid, take a moment to tell them how cool you think they are. We ALL know what it feels like to be the outcast kid and how much it means when someone takes a moment to see us. Do that for a kid and watch their whole physical presence change. As an added bonus, it’ll encourage them to always wear them in the future!
3. Before you solve problems, ask questions -
I know we all have moments where we just want to talk about our problems, and that’s it. We don’t want anyone to do anything about it. All we want is just to be heard So when you find yourself in a position where a friend is taking a moment to vent to you, ask some questions. Is this a situation in which I’m listening to hear or listening to solve? Or you can ask if they want to talk about it or be distracted from it. We can all be very protective of our people and want to solve all of their problems, but sometimes they just need us to listen. So, ask some questions before you Hulk out trying to solve their problems.
4. Breakup advice -
First, don’t backslide. Secondly, take the opportunity to do ten things that your ex didn’t love or wouldn’t do with you. You’ll feel better doing what you enjoy and realize how much of yourself was being held back. Thirdly, see the next piece of advice.
5. Rage texting/writing -
Just don’t. Whether it is for work or a personal relationship (platonic or otherwise), rage texting, emailing, or writing shouldn’t happen when you’re heated. Get it down, hit save as draft, and then walk away. If you can sleep on it, but from all of us that have been there, please don’t actually send it. You’ll be more clear in the morning and are more likely to make a better choice.
6. Know the difference -
Take the time to know the difference between the basics. For example, affect and effect are not the same thing. Know the difference. Also, e.g., and, i.e., are not the same thing. Know the difference. The English language is tricky, and while most of us haven’t been in school for a minute, take the time to reteach yourself the difference between the tricker parts of our language.
7. Pass it on -
You probably know your grandparents’ names, but what about great or even great-great? There’s an old adage that most of us are forgotten after the fourth generation. That means your great-great-grandchildren will, most likely, know nothing about you and who you are. Rather than leave it to chance, make your mark!
Find a blank book and ask each family member over 50 years old to write down their life advice that they want their descendants to know, whether it’s 100 years or 500 years from now. Keep passing it down to each generation. Each passing generation will not only know your name but what you want to pass along as well.
8. Write it down -
Get in the habit of writing it down. Your grocery lists, your ideas, phone messages, or appointments all need to be written down. Find a planner that has extra space and room to write. Your brain will trick you into thinking it can remember… but your brain is a liar, write it down.
9. Does it Matter -
How many times have you walked into a room and instantly thought, “Oof, those shoes.” or “Well, this was a choice.” You may never say it out loud, but the thought remains. The next time you find yourself judging someone's something (clothing, hobbies, etc.), ask yourself, “What does it matter to me?” The less you care about the personal preferences of others, the more relaxed and nicer you will become to others and possibly even to yourself.